Blogs, Page 388

Holding your breath is one, but there has to be others.  Share if you have one.

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I don't know about you, but thw World is a pretty mean and hateful place where everyone is out for themselves.  The European Union is officially broken apart, and the United Nations ceases to exist, is there any segment of a Democratically Free nation willing to step up and take on the biggest "Bully" the World has ever seen?  Gay men, tops and bottoms, united together may be the only real threat to combat terrorism and the reasons for this are plain as day:

    Gay men are less likely to kill anyone because they have an inner desire to fuck, rather than kill other men.  

    Gay men are by far more creative at devising strategies to defend and protect themselves and eachother together than any heterosexual militant fighting for a whore wife thousands of miles from the battle field.  Gau soldiers in the field are more likely to get the job done, so they can get back to base and shower together after a hard fought battle against the enemy.  Gay soldiers are far less likely to attracked by an enemy who does not see them as equal.  Islamic fundamentalists are more likely to surrender rather than raise arms and fight an enemy that has intimate sexual relations with members of the same sex.  The only thing more repulsive than an unvieled woman are two men kissing eachother, but the reality of ISIS is that all of their hatred against women and men stems from their own frustration of being unable to come out of the closet they hide in often having sex with young boys truth be told.

The late great Mahommed Ali once said, "The Truth is the funniest thing of all".  It's no joke that a Gay Militia would bring an end to ISIS quicker than flies on shit.  Privately funded and heavily armed, a Gay Militia could take over the World.  Anyone want to join me?

In the past I regret I have written stories that have turned heads on their ears, ruffled more than just feathers, but in some cases mainstream m4m "happy" and "go lucky" flaming fags take exception to morbid literature.  To each his own, but unto thy self the truth be known, and this thy true story is in its entirety, inside and out, left, right, up, and down plus turned inside and out again the absolutely positively THE TRUTH.  NO LIE.  In accordance with the International Accord on Human Rights this declaration is made under threat of holy sodomy punishable by worse without lubricant by the Judge and in his chambers alone without witness if it is proven to be otherwise:

THIS STORY IS SO TRUE, READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.  DO NOT ATTEMPT ANYTHING YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ AT HOME.

Last night was absolutely totally insane, and I mean totally mentally tripping.  It was starting to get late and since I had no plans, I was going to cuddle up with the laptop in bed and just edge myself off hopefully getting a good nut sometime around dawn.  Well, I broke out with the camera and started taking pics of my dick, and I'll be dawg gone, I felt like someone slipped a viagra in my drink.  After watching some of the outright most incredible gay porn on the Internet I almost turned into a wolf.  I mean it's like the hair and everything, and I was totally tripping because we just had the Cannabis Cup and WOW that concentrate and one hundred percent THC is some super fucking killer shit that will get you fucking wasted, and I MEAN WASTED OFF YOUR ASS FOR TWO DAY fucked up.  To make a long story short, I became hornier than hornier has ever been and horny is as horny does, I clicked over to Craigslist, and found what seemed to be a really interesting fellow.  

He said he had a "Gloryhole" and wanted to suck off guys twenty to forty about thirty miles away from me.  I took a shower, shaved, brushed my teeth, cleansed my asshole better than a surgeon cleans the dirt from inside a hang nail, and I even used deordorant and brushed my teeth.  So I hopped into the car and floored it as I got on the freeway onramp,  I didn't let off until I was cruising about 90 m.p.h.  I hate to drive at night, but if you're going to engage in something so incredibly dangerous as driving at night, you better do it in a matter that tells everyone else on the road, "Hey I own the road, so don't go trying anything stupid or fucking around".   Aggressive Defensive Driving takes a lot out of you so I eventually ended up having to slow down because they were doing all kinds of roadwork.  I couldn't help but fathom, what are all those Highway Patrolmen doing sitting in those cars all day long watching men (Cal Trans:  They claim to be men, but their orange vests say "I'm God's Gift To All Men, I'm Really A Women.  So Don't Run Me Over Motherfucker".  )  At this point traffic slowed to a crawl, and I could feel my rock hard cock inside my shorts twitching and itching to get out, take a breath of fresh air, and hang out like old times.  I decided to go total pants down which means everything off, and if it isn't off then its down below the back of the knees, but not so far below the ankles that if an emergency arose, they could not be pulled up in a moments notice.  I don't know what it is about those red and blue flashing lights too, I mean honest to God, it was Saturday Night Fever 70's Bee Gees and it was still Friday night.  So my pud is harder than a rock and flapping off of the leather seat with two different kinds of lubricant. An oil based and water based.  

Sexually Deviant Auto Induced Hyper Hallucination is the phenomenon of seeing things that aren't there, but because you wish they were so much the dopamine (homegrown synthetic barbituate cocktail) inside of one of the various penis shaped lobes within your brain actually begin fucking result in an indistinguishable visual hallucination that is second to none as close as close can get to the real thing.  When the traffic came to a complete stop, I kind of pulled off to the side of the road up along side the car, a van in front of me, and a sedan which pulled up along side of me that was behind me.  I couldn't help myself at this point, I was having a rare form of hypothalmus emission so I had all but lost all control of retaining seminal fluid inside of my balls.  It's an awfully scary experience and can be as, or even more intense tham the stress of the ending of the World would have upon someone.  As you know seminal fluid in and of itself is especially slick and the increased body heat fogging up the windows which had to be rolled down taking down the darkened window tint let's just say, in that moment of heightened orgasmic awareness, reduced to billiseconds (one billionth of a second.)  I'm totally in hands off/ hands free mode just bouncing it off of the leather upholstery that a little mink oil now and then does wonders for making cow hide feel better than pussy which we all know is only surpassed by the hole of a man. It's feeling ggggoooooooooddddd.  In fact, IT'S REAL REAL REAL GOOD!  So I figured what the Hell if I went to all this trouble to expose myself to these other vehicles, the least I could do is look up at them to let them know that this was a seizure and I had no control. Luckily I always keep a sign that I can simply hold up without having to say anything.  After covering my eyes with my hands and doing a little peek a boo I'm about to use my eyes to see you, I look up and OMG,  it's just too good to make up people, guess what's looking back at me?  

READ PART TWO OF A TRUE AND CORRECT STORY TOLD UNDER PENALTY OF SODOMY BY THE JUDGE WITHOUT LUBE IF I LIE, WRITTEN BY CURIOUS MONK AND EXCLUSIVELY RELEASED AS IT WAS INTENDED TO BE BY "ONE HORNY FOOL".

COPYRIGHT MMXVIII CURIOUS MONK FOR CURIOUS MONK ALL RIGHTS, INCLUDING THOSE WHICH MAY NOT EXISTS AT THIS TIME, BUT MAY OCCUR IN THE REMOTE FUTURE ARE SOLELY UNTO MY OWN TO DO WHATEVER, WHENEVER, HOWEVER, AND ITS NO ONE'S BUSINESS EXCEPT UNTO THY SELF.