I had to leave for a while because someone outed me to my Dad. He was furious and physically forced me to move back home. Took my phone smashed my laptop cut me off from the outside world. I didn't get to go anywhere alone. we went to church from 9am to 9pm on Sunday. I had to endure special counseling from the priest 3 nights a week. I dont mean Special as in He was cute and we fucked, He was old as the bible and looked like he went to kindergarten with Jesus. Every session he would make me pray to God for my soul to be free of  deviant desires. I did everything my Dad asked of me. Finally about a week ago he asked me if I felt like my life was changed. I told him I felt like I was in an terrorist prison waiting for them to cut off my head. I told him that not matter what punishment or torture he came up with I would never be straight. At best all I could do was promise him that if the "Re-education" kept up i would end up totally sexually neutered. I would have so many mental problems that sex would be the least of my worries. I had already made up my mind that I was going to kill myself if it didn't stop. Then he wouldn't have to worry about being embarrassed by his fairy son. He said if you kill yourself its a mortal sin and you wont go to heaven. His face suddenly changed when I told him if i slit my own throat It would be HIM murdering me by proxy. Somehow that hit home and I saw tears in his eyes. He turned and slammed the door. He came back in a few hours later and told me he would never understand me being gay but he would rather have an alive gay son then a dead straight one. We both cried and sat together for a while on my bed. He wanted me to know he was only trying to help me and he loved me. He had always been taught that "faggots" were all degenerates, molesting school children and doing obscene things, dressing up in feathers like a drag queen. I laughed out loud, That was only a very small part of gay culture. I was a man, hair on my legs and all. I don't want to be a woman. I like other men, masculine men not drag queens or the over the top Rainbow roosters. I asked him how much of him and moms sex life was discussed amongst the neighbors. None for Gods sake! (My mom died when I was 16) Why should my sex life be any different. I'm not going to fuck on the front lawn ant high noon! I am gay, I am also me, the same me I have always been. The only thing that has changed is now you know. 

After much hugging and crying by all I believe he might understand a little bit better. I don't think he will ever fully understand or accept it but he is trying. I have a new apartment back in Tempe Arizona. A new laptop and phone and I am re-enrolled in school. Just as I was before. Dad is paying my tuition and I'm paying my rent. I have a savings account from when Mom died and it will cover modest expenses till I can get a part time job. I might get a roommate I'm just not sure yet. I just know I love my Dad, he was just trying in his way to help me. Now I believe his eyes are open and perhaps more understanding