Gayguy1996's Blogs

My anxiety is just off the hok. I was addicted to Xanax and overall it just made it worse. Its so hard to get out of bed. I use sex to make it go away but I am kind of ..well  a cock slut.  I  have 30 mg Adderall to gang bang. I love guys fucking me on Adderall. I do about 11 baseball jocks and 7 hockey jocks, usually not all at once but I have done them all at once. They are from a small college about 100 miles away..  I was a model and now on a college baseball scholarship. My 2 nephews asked me  to break them in one is 17 one is 15 so I let them fuck me and they are so into it no kissing just sex. My sister, their mom, is a psychiatrist and just has no clue why they always want to spend weekend with me. These 2 can cum twice in a row when they fuck me. Its amazing. Both are jocks and have hard bodies like me. 

I get up at 4:30 in the morning, spend the day overseeing harvesting of fruit in 90 degree temperatures, fight off creditors and banks and insects and fruit parasites, chase up unpaid invoices to wholesalers and supermarkets, in order to have the pleasure of handing over 42.7% of my income in State and Federal taxes. This is so freeloading subhuman parasites can get their unemployment checks, their foodstamps, or build their 'roads to nowhere', or so sick and demented Marines can change their gender. I find this 42.7% in taxes rather depressing and whenever I write out a check to pay my taxes I get even more depressed haha!

Oh I definitely fucking do. Its good to hear you say that it's OK to not be ok all the time!! I think we all feel that we have to be OK or GREAT or FINE all of the time, but it should be OK to say you've had a bad day or are feeling sad or down. Just take time to reflect and focus on yourself and what you need to do to make your happy again! 

I suffered from deep depressions for 15 years, don't know how i survived it, maybe just to keep the pain away from my parents. I managed to hide it but get aggressive often, not physically but verbal. I feel better since i met some years ago someone who fell in love with me, did not know why, i'm not a pretty man. Depressions come back from time to time, maybe 2 or 3 days per week and often just for some hours. I learned to life with them and still hiding them from everybody. There are always bad times and better ones.
I outed myself to my parents with 41 and started a life with new friends, gays and gay friendly people, thankfully to the men who felt in love with me.
We all hide some secrets and some of them are acid for our soul.

Depression fucked me up. But shit happens, right?

I have Borderline personality disorder ,and i take medications for it.But what works for me won't automatically for for another.Always best to seek professional help.

I probably have a legitimate form of depression. I've spent years now wanting nothing more than to die. I'd love to be better than okay at least sometimes ????

i think "antidepressants" are a scam.

i keep a 9mm close at hand

welbutrin is a miracle drug for me. low dose. struggled all my life. family thing

I don't think it is Okay to not be Okay.

Get some help.

I do and I honestly thing we all have down days or some degree of depression at various times in our life 

I have dealt with, at times, debilitating anxiety and my share of depression for most of my life. We all deal with it differently but I think, judging by the meme you posted, you are on the right track. Accept that anxiety and depression are there and part of you. I've found that the more you accept them and stop trying to control them, the less they control you.

I am prescribed duloxetine and xanax. Neither of them seem to have much effect anymore ????