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I tried o bring myself o write about this horrible, horrible, horrible story, but after two failed attempts I've decided not to write about it.  I's a horrible horrible horrible medical condition that no one should ever have to deal with, but for these individuals, roughly 1 to 3 percent of all me, he life they live really never amounts to anything because the condition they suffer from is so debilitating.  For those of us who don't suffer from it, all we want for those who do is to do everything we can possible do to help them which includes giving them encouragement, whenever possible, and as difficult as it may be o do treating them like you treat everyone else as though they did not have the condition at all.  Like the life they live which is never much of anything anyway, there is only pain and heartbreak.  Had my friend asked me to help him commit suicide, I would have agreed simply because the only dignity he will ever have is when he is dead.  So when he told me he had been researching a new treatment I was overjoyed and as excited to hear about it just as he was.  Over time my overjoy would subside until there was encouraging news, yet in the monotony of life our minds become complacent, and although we think we listen through our ears, we don't really.  We hear what our minds want us to hear, but this is all in hindsight, after the fact, it's too late to focus on listening, what's done is done, and it's too late and impossible to go back in time o change our mistakes.  That in and of itself could be the most tragic part of this tale, but i isn't and I'm just not ready to come to terms with the horrible horrible disaster that I encouraged.  What I want to know is why is it that other people are always compelled to ask me for my opinion as though my opinion is the right opinion.  I'm not incapable of making mistakes in fact I've probably made more mistakes in my life than the dumbest of the dumb combined.   This is how devastating the story is that I can't even continue because there is no solution or answer and he last thing I am ever going to do is offer words of encouragement because the optimist that used to live inside me is already dead.  For all of you people who always look on the bright side, you can look on the bright side one too many times and hopefully you will blind yourself because if you don't your brain will find itself unable to handle the radiation and your head will explode. The heat turns the water into steam and when the volume released out your ears can no longer handle the amount of steam being produced KABOOM.  In the case of my friend, it was the head of his penis.  A penis that was in and of itself nonexistent.   Somewhere there is a moral, but you won't find it here today, or any other for that matter.  If you could, I wouldn't and for those who won't I hope you never do.  It simply too complex to try and figure out why a fool would even try.  He wanted to die and it killed him every day of his life to live, so in that regard I'm thankful he got his wish the son of a bitch.