maxumillion21's Blogs

agree. you come out when its right for you. you shouldnt be forced into it. its your decision and your choice and your life.

@somerset..I'm 61 I have never come out to anyone but over time some friends and family have figured it out. one in 2004 when I left fire dept. dumped me because I confided in here why I quit. her loss..she died and took her hatred to the grave with her. Don't feel obligated to come out to anyone unless you feel it's time, safe to do so, and necessary.

I agree with cybermalemk about following your heart. The only way you can free yourself is to be yourself. I believe it's a process of self-liberation. Despite what religions say about needing a savior or other-power to find freedom or salvation, it's something only you can do. No one else can actually live your life, though they may want to control it. Sometimes knowing who you are, the heart of you, can take awhile, decades for some of us. And then for others having sex or falling in love quickly takes care of it. Then some don't make it at all. There are no guarantees in life. The best thing to do if you are feeling confused is to actually talk to supportive people, get involved in a glBt group. If you are paralyzed by fear and anxiety, the best thing to do is get professional help, someone who can help you from an objective perspective and who has no self-serving agenda. They can help you uncover the core beliefs and self-thinking that are most likely creating your pain and confusion, and help you find ways of dealing with them or changing them. Best of luck.

@Somerset1 Sorry to hear that. I know it's not easy... and there are a lot of people who are afraid to come out. My advice to you would be this: keep following your heart.... if your heart tells you not to come out then stay as you are.. as long as you are happy ;)

@somerset - they would probably say "ewww yuk! what a poofy girly man" and shun you forever more.

I still have not come out, to afraid of what friends and family would say

I came out when I was 14. Nervous as heck I walked into the kitchen and told my 'mother'. She said "I know" and that was it. 4 days later I was disowned. I never look back... and always hold my head up high. They may not have liked me for who I am, but to this day I'm glad I came out :)

Ok, I have been married for years, knew I like guys and girls at 11. I have a happy marriage, kids and enjoy sex with my wife and fun on skype etc...with young guys. You can have your cake and eat it if you want. There is no need to "come out" as it were. I didnt, havent and wont.

It isn't your heterosexuality that is fighting with your gay self. It is the cognitive dissonance between who you have been taught you are SUPPOSED to be by the external influences around you and who you really are. Growing up I heard all the usual disparagement and ridicule directed against gays. When my peers got ahold of a Playboy magazine and everyone was oohing and aahing as they gawked at the centerfold, I oohed and aahed along with them yet I felt nothing. However, in the showers right after phys/ed, I felt a strange thrill about being naked in front of other naked boys. And there were a few boys whose bodies I found to be strangely compelling and I would always try to shower beside them so that I could sneak furtive looks at their bodies without them noticing. Later, when laying in bed and my cock hardened, I would conjure up mental images of them to masturbate to. Never did I ever masturbate to female imagery. I realized that I was a homosexual - that type of person whom those around me ridiculed and reviled. A realization that caused me a great deal of inner conflict at the time. And then a magical and transformational moment happened. When I finally took a guy's hard cock in my mouth for the first time, sucked him to ejaculation and swallowed down all his sperm, the scales fell from my eyes and I could see clearly for the first time. At that wondrous moment, I came out to and accepted myself. From then on, I never again let others determine who I am supposed to be and any conflict I ever had about my homosexuality vanished completely never to return. I live my life completely on my terms and no one else's and the only person whose approval I care about is myself. When I'm laying on my stomach naked in bed, look over my shoulder and see a hot naked guy kneeling between my spread legs, his rock hard cock throbbing and glistening with anal lube in the candlelight, the look of desire for me on his face, feel his hands exploring my naked body in a sexual way, feel my own rock hard cock throbbing against my belly in anticipation of what's about to happen - I feel no embarrassment, no shame, no confusion. I feel like the arrow that springs from the bow, caring nothing about where it's going but rather only the joy of flying freely. And this is how you free yourself from your conflict and confusion Max. Go to the mirror, look yourself in the face, and say to yourself "I am a homosexual, this is what I am, this is who I am. I will not longer allow others to define me. I will no longer let others determine how I feel about myself. I am perfect just the way I am." After you've done that then act upon it. Go and actively seek out a homosexual experience. Once you have, then the scales will also fall from your eyes and everything will finally become clear to you. And you will fly free as an arrow.

Well when first watching some gay porn I also did feel a bit confused. I did like the videos and also was thinking whether I'm gay or bi or donno. Well now I'm certain I'm bi but didn't tell anybody, yet. (Maybe never will, I donno). So only the ppl on here and TTB know.
That's also why I don't upload any pics/vids of myself.

I also would love to have a relationship with a girl (make a family and stuff) but also I would love to have a guy to have some fun with.

I know what you are feeling, but it's okay ;)

If you like young men than it's nice, if you also like girls it's nice, too ;)
batmanseeksrobin already said: when you are bi you have the advantage you don't need to look at a specific gender :D
Just be what you are are: bi and don't let anyone tell that this is a "sickness" and needs to be treated or something. Just natural

coming out doesn't have anything to do with accepting the fact of your sexual orientation. you sound confused, but your attraction to young men indicates you may be gay. your embarrassment and confusion is your inner self battling about owning up to being gay. it is only then that you will feel ready and comfortable with coming out. good luck!

you need not feel any shame or guilt. You are bisexual, so what?..you have the best situation..you have twice as many to choose from lol, unlike gays or str8's. You have nothing to feel bad about, and aren't required to tell anyone or live up to the worlds expectations. Enjoy being you and explore....to hell with what others MIGHT think..you owe nobody an explanation my friend, and you certainly DON'T need to come out to anyone. just love and know YOU will be loved ok? chat private anytime hugz paparon xoxo